Growing Pains
FROM A LETTER DATED “24 Setembro 2012” [but actually received December 2012]
“To learn a new language requires lots of time” (learn the language, ch. 7). Be patient with yourself.
When you are on the Lord’s errand, you are entitled to the Lord’s help.
There have been times, of course, that I straight-up quit. Yep, we were teaching a family (the “father”—they’re not married—is less-active). And, as I taught my 2nd part of the lesson, I just gave up! I paused for the 2nd time; and any type of pause, in Portuguese culture, is just awkward. I tried to search for the complicated word that I had easily used before and didn’t find it… then—oh, I hate when this happens—I tried to switch to English to find the word in English, and it just plain WASN’T THERE! So, I did what we would do
“To learn a new language requires lots of time” (learn the language, ch. 7). Be patient with yourself.
When you are on the Lord’s errand, you are entitled to the Lord’s help.
There have been times, of course, that I straight-up quit. Yep, we were teaching a family (the “father”—they’re not married—is less-active). And, as I taught my 2nd part of the lesson, I just gave up! I paused for the 2nd time; and any type of pause, in Portuguese culture, is just awkward. I tried to search for the complicated word that I had easily used before and didn’t find it… then—oh, I hate when this happens—I tried to switch to English to find the word in English, and it just plain WASN’T THERE! So, I did what we would do
in the Brazil CTM when we needed to laugh and not take ourselves too seriously: I said, “I give up,” tossed the [Plan of Salvation] figures up in the air and started to cry, not laugh, like we did in the CTM. The thing was, I wasn’t crying because I couldn’t find a word, I was crying because I KNEW they weren’t learning from what I was saying. I KNEW that as soon as we left their house, the husband would go out with his drinking buddies. I KNEW that he—a returned missionary—could teach about the Plan of Salvation better than I could dream of, but he wasn’t LIVING according to what he knew to be true. How could his “wife” accept the gospel if he couldn’t show her through his example that true doctrine, understood, can change habits faster than anything else? I was sitting in front of a family that could be healed by the merciful Atonement of Jesus Christ, and I couldn’t help them SEE how they can change.
The father cautiously crouched over, picked up the figures, and encouraged me to continue. He said my Portuguese was great and that they were understanding everything I said. The mom assured me that the ruckus the kids were making wasn’t distracting her, but that wasn’t the point. What’s the point in teaching a lesson when the investigator isn’t hearing with his/her heart? The Holy Ghost will carry the message TO their heart but not INTO the heart. The thing I often forget is sometimes we have to “cut” our investigators to the center; we have to give them tough love, or they won’t change. I should have stopped and expressed my concern, asked inspired questions, followed the Holy Ghost; so, finally, my words—although flawed and few—would make a difference. Quality, not quantity. Some days are more difficult than others. Even though I’ve been out in the field 5 months now, I still have days that are linguistically harder than my first few weeks… put together! Perhaps it’s a way to keep me humble. Perhaps it’s for me to remember to rely more on the Holy Ghost. Perhaps there needs to be an awkward pause in the lesson to make the investigator think… or pay more attention. Or maybe it’s because I didn’t try to study diligently during language training. Perhaps it’s a punishment of disobedience… or perhaps it’s all wrapped up in one big answer: Change. For a tree to grow bigger and stronger, it has to be pruned. For high jumpers to have more technical skills in their jump, they have to change their approach. There are growing pains in all things. It’s scary! But if we “trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding,” He will “direct thy paths.” (Proverbs 3:5-6) Never be afraid to speak your mind. If you do it out of love, out of charity (and following the Holy Ghost), you will NEVER go wrong. These 2 things are the things I’m going to focus on my whole mission: If I don’t learn ANYTHING, I will learn to have charity and the Spirit. Sister Soneghet is focusing on always having a good relationship with her companions and the Spirit. Her setting apart blessing told her that she will be a blessing
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